Coping with a Breakup as an Anxious and Depressive Person

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Let me start by saying there is absolutely nothing wrong with suffering from depression, or anxiety. Just because you are a little special, special because your brain is more active than “normal” guys (whoever they are. Normal is overrated). When you have a mood or a personality disorder, dealing with disappointments and rejection could be really challenging, at first, or all the time.

Researchers say emotional pain is worse and lasts longer than physical pain. Many depressed people are also highly sensitive. So when someone betrays you, the kind of pain you feel is intensely magnified like this tiny hurt is placed under an electron microscope. The pain you feel is worse than losing both limbs in an explosion, then getting your nails pulled out, one after another using a pliers. If you feel or have ever felt like this, you are not alone.

Here are some of the ways you can get through it.

  1. Do all the freaky batshit crazy stuff that comes to your very imaginative head. Or at least some. You don’t want to do something just because you want to end up on National Television, or on the radio. Or worse still, on the front page of the dailies. Do it because you are doing it for YOU, for your sanity, whatever that is. This small ritual will help you feel a little better afterwards. I cannot promise you it will be 100% effective, but it will be the beginning of a healing process.
  2. Talk to people. They say a problem half shared is half solved right? Of course your pals, therapists or audience will not give you solutions but talking about what you’re going through will definitely help. So talk to a friend, a stranger, a wall, your dog (cats aren’t good listeners).
  3. Journal. Writing down helps a whole lot. This will help you let out things you didn’t even know you felt or thought. You will be amazed about the VOICE a pen and paper will give you. This is also for things you don’t want to say out loud, but you still want to air. Make it dramatic, draw what you feel if that’s the best way you can express yourself. Write down your moods every single day. Your highs and lows. Try figure out what sets certain feelings off. Writing could be hard at first but you will notice that it makes you feel better with time. Or at least you will know what your progress is.writing
  4. EXERCISE! Work out your aggression. Listen to pumped up music while you are at it! Make sure you sweat more than three pigs sitting in a steam bath. This will help calm your nerves, promise. It will help keep anxiety on the low and you will get some sleep at night. 🙂
  5. Get a new hobby. Or just do something you like to do and make sure you have fun while you are at it. This will help keep your individuality and you will remember to love yourself again. Staying inactive will unearth thoughts that will make you want to buy amnesia at a drug store, so you don’t remember whatever happened. Go out, get some sunshine. If you like being indoors, get a pet. When you take care of it, you will be taking care of yourself too because you will have to get up on both feet. Wallowing in bed or staying in a horizontal position is the best way to plunge right back into depression.
  6. Don’t ignore your emotions. Cry if you want to, you are not a log of wood. Buy a screaming box (I can’t tell you where to get one of those though). Step into your closet and scream your lungs out. Bottling up your emotions will only result in more mental breakdown.2370375218_36a889afe2_z
  7. Get professional help. It’s not mandatory but it is important to know when you might need it. Do not hurt yourself.

Most of all, just remember that when you find yourself in this kind of situation, it is not the end of the world. Treat it like a mental project and make sure to pass the test. Remember you have a higher purpose in life. You are not a victim. Remember that even if you have hit rock bottom, the best things about it is that you cannot possibly go any lower. The only other movement is upwards, and your spirits will get higher and it will be alright in the end. And if it’s not alright, then it’s not the end;

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No One is Getting Out Alive

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I always think about my death. Of how people will react to the news of my death. And the first thing they will say when they get the news about my death. I never think about what will be said at my funeral though. Because to be honest, I don’t think I have met the person who will eulogize me properly, well except for my parents, who I never talk to that much. (Like when I’m on phone with my mum, we talk about what we’re eating, or what we ate, or if we intend to eat at all. Basically, we talk about food. And the weather. When I’m on phone with my father, I ask how he is – he always says he’s fine, by the way – and then I ask about the weather and then that’s it.) I think about how I will look like, dead. But that doesn’t bemuse me. I like to imagine my mother will be at my funeral, because I cannot handle, or fathom having it the other way round – I think a lot, don’t I?

Sometimes, this scares me. Other times, I want to die! I want to die, because I’m so afraid of dealing with life. I want to die because sometimes I think that the absence my death will cause, will copiously punish those who have wronged me. But then again I imagine they will probably not give a hoot, like I will have done them a favor. I just want to die, so much so, that I want to live. Because I think of what a shame it would be to die, not having have lived. Not having tried to do something with my life.

I want to live. So much, because I know one day I will be someone. Someone whom – the people I want to punish with my death – will look at and be ashamed of their deeds. I want to shame them with my life and existence.

I want to be fearless. To deal with all the things that put me down on the days I want to punish people. All in all, it doesn’t matter who you are, what you do, how much you have. I don’t think there’s anyone else who will experience a coronation or assumption in their death. Thus, be kind. Be thoughtful. Be daring, but civil. But most of all, live;